In preparation of our Cape Cod @Bar/Twitter/Pownce monthy meetup this Friday night, I figured I would perhaps make a drink that combines both a martini with a tech twist. So, I figured the best way to do this was find out, what is every techies’ favorite martini, or favorite drink?

Which reminds me of a good joke:

Four Fonts walk into a bar and the barman says, Get out! We don’t want your TYPE in here!

Oh come on, you boorish bloggers, maniacal marketeers, debutante designers and anal-retentive developers - lighten up and laugh! And vote on one of these martinis, or suggest your own.

#1 - Bringon The Klingon

Gin
Vermouth
A dash of bloodwine (I kid you not - seems to be some Klingon liquor -however we will substitute with “olive juice and just make it a very dirty filthy martini instead)

Pour in a shaker with ice and pour into martini glass shouting “Heghlu’meH QaQ jajvam” which I believe means,”Today is a good day to die!” Yeh!

I was trying to look up how to say “Cheers!” in Klingon, but I could not in the short time I actually tried. I think the whole idea that people actually continue speaking Klingon and devote time to it is actually quite disturbing. But each his own. And me posting it here is equally disturbing.

I did however find out how to say something else on the Everyday Klingon Phrases website.

Hab SoSlI’ Quch!

Your mother has a smooth forehead - supposedly not a very nice thing to say.

I could have put Alberan Whisky or Romulan Ale, which I believe were actually mentioned in the tv series, but this is a martini series. Why I have this knowledge, do not even ask.

#2 - The Bulgarian Hacker

Vodka - Preferably homemade in your grandmother’s still in the turnip cellar, where you still live at 35 years old and hack the Pentagon with a black market Lenovo PC and with a Chinese version of Windows and have pictures of Jenna Jameson on your stalagmite walls…or is that stalactite?
Pineapple Juice - Rationed from WWII and still actually, quite juicy…
Chambord® - Bought on Russian Black Market with counterfeit Euros - yet strangely there is a “Hello Kitty” logo on front…

Pour vodka, pineapple juice and Chambord® in martini shaker with ice. Shake and pour in martini glass.

Nazdrave!!!

#3 - The Vista Irish Car Bomb

1/4 pint Guinness® stout
1/2 shot Bailey’s® Irish cream
1/2 shot Jameson® Irish whiskey

Add the Bailey’s and Jameson to a shot glass, layering the Bailey’s on the bottom. Pour the Guinness into a pint glass or beer mug 3/4 of the way full and let settle. Drop the shot glass into the Guinness and chug.   

If you don’t drink it fast enough it will curdle and increasingly taste worse.

Kind of like using Vista….

#4 - Boba the Fett’s Wicky Wicky Woo-Woo

Let’s see, since I cannot get the rap song out of my head, I figured I would at least have a drink associated with it. Perhaps every time someone yells “Wicky Wicky Woo” we take a shot. Brilliant!

Grey Goose Citron
Cointreau
Cranberry Juice

Shake all with ice in a cocktail shaker. Rim the martini glass with a sliced lemon, and pour drink in.

Wicky Wicky Woo!

#5 - The iMartini

It doesn’t matter if you choose it anyway. Steve might already have it copyrighted. Boom.
I happen to love this martini. So, we are using it for the iMartini. I thought of doing an “Apple” martini, but thought I’d get sued. Booom. Then I thought of doing the iTunesTini, then figured I would get sued again. Boom. So, here it is, the iMartini. Boom.

Fresh Squeezed Lemon Juice - about 1/2 to 1 lemon
A little Cointreau or Simple Syrup
Vodka - Grey Goose Citron
Ice
Superfine Sugar
1 Lemon Drop candy

Mix Lemon Juice with a “splash” of Cointreau or Simple Syrup, to 3 parts Vodka. Pour over ice in a martini shaker and shake vigorously for a few seconds. Use a lemon wedge to wet the rim of a martini glass and dip in superfine sugar. Pour over the lemon drop on the bottom of the glass and enjoy!

Caveat: Do not mix the iMartini with the Vista Car Bomb - there will be no tech support for the entire evening and rebooting in the toilet is just not dignified.

If none of these tickle your fancy, then suggest one!

I am only a mere mortal to all you Tech Gods that I revere every day….