Whenever I think of the “Luck of the Irish”, I always think - potato famine and blight. Not because I am depressing, but when do the Irish have any luck? Read through history, and I’ll show you a whole heap of unlucky poop. For one, all the non-Irish think that the Irish are lucky. If you know anything about the Irish, they are all depressing. I remember my grandmother and her sisters used to go to funerals all the time - and they didn’t even know who was the stiff in the box - they just went. Now that’s depressing.

The term “Luck of the Irish” is a pejorative term relating to the millions of Irish starving to death while raising crops for the English landlords. Which brings me to a rather schizophrenic duplicitous moment - I am English as well. Man, talk about internal strife. Not to mention, I am also Scottish and Welsh. What does this prove? That I am indeed qualified to drink, throw Molotov cocktails, make leek soup, then go on a hunger strike, all whilst standing in a queue.

Remember the last post when I said I had a “Free Pass” because I dated an Asian? Well, I am Irish, so I can say anything I bloody want in this post. I have the shamrock tattoo to prove it. And of course, it helps if your maternal lineage extends from County Cork in the form of my grandmother who was a twin and the youngest of 12. And we think we have things tough these days.

In spirit of the wee little people who visit us once again this balmy March day, hats off to the Irish, for giving us the following things we are (sometimes) proud of but are certainly indebted to them for:

• Guinness
• methanol
• cirrhosis
• the rhythm method
• shenanigans
• Sinead O’Connor
• Milk of Magnesia
• the hypodermic syringe
• Harp
• Pierce Brosnan (whoops - Northern Irish - I feel hate mail upon me…)

Ever hear of an Irish Martini? I have not made this, but wanted to share this recipe from a friend:

Irish Martini Recipe

6 parts buffalo grass vodka
1 part dry vermouth
Irish whiskey
Lemon twist

Rinse a chilled cocktail glass with Irish whiskey. Combine vodka and vermouth in a cocktail shaker with cracked ice and shake well. Strain into a chilled cocktail glass and garnish with lemon twist.

A little bit of randomness here but does anyone remember shamrock shakes at McDonalds? Do they still have them?

I just found that recipe for anyone seeking a non-alcoholic blast from the past this St. Paddy’s Day:

McDonalds’ Shamrock Shake (without chemicals)
2 cups vanilla ice cream
1 1/4 cups low-fat milk
1/4 teaspoon mint extract (not peppermint)
8 drops green food coloring

Combine all ingredients in a blender and blend on high speed until smooth.
Stop blender to stir with a spoon if necessary to help blend ice cream.
Pour into two 12 ounce cups and serve each with a straw.
This is a fun way to Shake up St. Paddy’s day.

I guess I could go on and mention a bunch of Irish proverbs and sayings, but I think I will let all the non-Irish be Irish today and let them have the gift of the gab and the DUIs.

Just remember, it was in fact the Irish Playwright Oscar Wilde, who invented the term “Alcoholiday”. Seems fitting that a Irishman created such a perfect word. I shall be using that a lot in the future.

If you have any great martinis, add it below to the comments or email us at feedback@atbar.com. See you next week!